Jess Frid On Breaking The Mould

Words by Elizabeth Briskin

Jess Frid isn’t a woman who does things by halves. Her story is dotted with the types of things others might talk about, but rarely do. Such as packing up to live in Ibiza for two months while her children were babies. Letting a six-month stint in Byron turn into six years. Or buying a hotel on a whim.

Born and raised in Melbourne, Jess recalls a childhood “rich with storytelling, love and food.” Being surrounded by family and close friends instilled strong values and taught her about the importance of inclusiveness, community and coming together. “My upbringing created a sense of security that enabled me to step out into the world, to be brave and bold, to take risks, challenge ideas and challenge myself.”

Jess always enjoyed being around children and playing with them felt natural and easy. “I always knew I’d be a mum, but honestly, I never considered life beyond that fact.” Her journey to motherhood took a few years. After two miscarriages, Jess fell pregnant with her son and then again when he was just nine months old. “It was a wild time spanning three and a half years of being deeply house-bound and introverted in the midst of a metaphorical Melbourne winter.” The babies nap schedule meant Jess was inside for most of the day and something about this didn’t sit well with her. “We were yearning for warmth and a more outdoor life.”

Spontaneously, she made the decision to jump on a plane to Ibiza, chasing “a whiff I had of community life in the north part of the island that seemed to have a lot of young families living a life I couldn’t quite articulate but sensed was what we were looking for.”

It was here that Jess realised motherhood could look a little different, one where kids and parents were more integrated and could enjoy time as a family. The rigidity of naps and schedules fell by the wayside. Instead, evenings were spent beachside with pizza, beer and music, with parents carrying sleepy children home at sunset.  It was a lightbulb moment for Jess and one that would change her parenting perspective going forward: “we didn’t need to be house bound and regimented. We didn’t need to constantly arrange a babysitter so we could go out and have some fun. Life could be fun with our kids. It suited us and inspired an awakening of the type of life we wanted to enjoy with our kids.”

The family came back to Melbourne and then decided to move to Byron Bay. This wasn’t an easy decision, as Jess had always planned to replicate her own childhood for her children, but there was a yearning to explore a different path she couldn’t ignore. “It was the appeal of adventure, living more connected to nature and a more creative, unwritten path that sung to our hearts.” They love and miss their lives in Melbourne, but Jess explains “there is a sense of freedom that comes with living in a small, coastal town that we hadn’t known before.”

Jess is currently based in the Northern Rivers, NSW, with husband Dave, son Rocco (9), daughter Billie (8) and puppy Ai-Wei-Wei.  There, the couple have found it easy to mimic all those things they loved about Ibiza. Time pressures have eased, providing more empty space in which the family can be at the beach, surfing or climbing rocks. Jess realised she was a more relaxed mother in this environment and as a result, the children were allowed a longer leash and more opportunity to explore and take risks.

Jess’s career journey has unintentionally veered towards the creative from the outset. After graduating with a commerce degree, she worked for Spotlight Stores within the marketing department. Her role combined her love for kids and her emerging creativity: she was to build an online creative kids club.

It was at Spotlight that Jess realised the impact she could have on underprivileged communities. A joint project with World Vision saw her travel to Uganda to donate refurbished sewing machines to empower women to be able to sew and earn their own incomes. “That was such an eye opening, life changing experience for me,” she says. On returning to Australia, Jess sought out “exposure to some of our more marginalised communities” via not-for-profit Igniting Change.  This work was varied and hugely impressionable and Jess continues to reflect on her learnings years later.

Her career was put on pause while she had kids, then the family relocated to Byron, and this led her in a new direction. The Byron move was always meant to be short term, but after a year had passed, Jess felt a “desire to connect more closely to this place that was starting to feel like home. I wanted to immerse myself more deeply into the community.”

“When Byron Sunseeker – a dated 80s brick motel – presented as an opportunity, we took it as a fortuitous omen and just jumped in, somewhat blind. Just took the plunge.” Jess describes what happened next as “one of the most genuine and authentic creative journeys I’ve been on.” The couple set to work, firstly finding a builder who aligned with their commitment to sustainability and ensuring the renovation left the lightest possible environmental footprint. They put together a team of like-minded creatives and their vision came to life: “a place where children were welcome but a place that would have also appealed to us and our friends. We wanted it to feel accessible, inviting and fun!”

During the process they met many local creatives and artisans. One of Jess’s favourite pieces is a woven Dr Seuss hat that sits in the library, which was crafted from old fishing nets that were retrieved from the ocean. “Connecting with the artist in her small workshop by the ocean and hearing her stories opened our eyes to ocean conservation. Each piece in the hotel carries a story like that. It’s what made the process so rewarding.”

The hotel is run by a general manager and his team but Jess and Dave – and the kids – remain actively involved. The kids were “excited and engaged” about Sunseeker from the beginning and were involved with things such as the playground design.

Living in Byron allows Jess a daily routine that looks a little different to her city counterparts. After breakfast as a family, Dave usually drops the kids at school and Jess can exercise and have a bit of time to herself. She will work from a café or from home before picking the children up from school. But she has learnt to “break the mould” along the way and for her this means avoiding the 9-5 grind. “Surfing and connection to nature has had an enormous impact on my well-being. The sheer joy of dropping everything in the middle of a ‘workday’ because it’s sunny and dreamy out in the ocean will fill my cup beyond words.” If she has a deadline or a heavier workload, she will find the time to complete her work once the kids are asleep. “Remembering to play and have fun like a kid as an adult is the most important thing I’ve ever learnt.”

Travel remains an important part of family life. “For us, it’s our joy and delight to do as much as we can with our kids.” Next up is an adventure to Colorado and Utah. All trips are planned as a family, and this trip came about in part from a book of Billie’s about crystals and rocks. “A lot of the crystals were from Utah, and we decided it would be so cool to go crystal fossicking – and a trip was born!”

To read more about Sunseeker, Byron Bay visit their website or Instagram.